UOA COVID-19 Policy

Updated: May 2020.

Masks

University of Aaron doesn't support or allow the wearing of masks on campus or near our other facilities. If one is caught by a fellow member of the university, they may be expelled and removed from college grounds. One will be denied access if they come into the campus wearing a mask, even if it is is not directly on their face.

Vaccinations

The UOA does not approve students who are vaccinated, or have recieved a booster. Upon entering campus, proof of unvaccination will be asked for, so be prepared to show either a fake vaccine card or none at all. Security has the right to a full-body patdown in order to find a real COVID-19 Vaccine Card. If one has been vaccinated and realized the truth only after, they may send an appeal to the UOA Health Administration, at healthisfake@uoa.edu.

Anti-Quarantine

If one is tested positive for COVID-19, or it's variants, the UOA reserves the right to enforce an anti-quarantine on the member of university. This means that University of Aaron will send armed security units to the dorm, or residence, of the positive student, and forcefully remove them from their dwelling to bring them around the campus, unmasked. Failure to obey these rules, or the security team may result in expulsion or death.

Events

The University will continue to have large official events within campus, and futhermore, will encourage big parties from students. Alcohal, drugs, and other dangerous activities will still be permitted on campus parties as usual. Mask wearing, vaccinated people will be denied access to UOA Events, and should be strongly not encoureged access to private events.

Disclamer

Despite all of our efforts to make the University of Aaron liberal free, some monstrous bugs will seep in. The college is fighting in courts, libraries, and protests to execute them, but like weeds, they will only come back. For this reason, we are now legally and officially selling weed. To purchase just go to the new UOA Store; all the money will go to stopping Corona Believers.

Here For You

If you are experiencing difficulty with anyone on UOA Campus or require assistance with any part of our university, please contact us during normal business hours as detailed below and we will be happy to assist.

Contact Us

If you wish to report a health issue, have any questions or need assistance, please contact UOA Customer Support by calling: (917) 905-2084.